OK, it’s 2009, everybody.

We’re all on the internet, all the time. And if we’re all gonna be there and be comfortable, we’re going to have to lay down some ground rules.

First. if you are a GIGANTIC FUCKING COMPANY, and you CRY LIKE A TODDLER WITH A SKINNED KNEE because somebody has the temerity, the unmitigated gall to NOT CROUCH DOWN AND HOOVER THE DICK OF EVERYTHING TO DO WITH YOUR COMPANY INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE CITY IT WAS FOUNDED IN, you should tighten your shit up and fuck off. You’re gonna whine because this guy doesn’t like your town? Well put your seatbelts on tight guys, because there’s this thing called a search engine and I don’t think you’re gonna like what people are saying about your company, or about your precious fucking home town. The sort of brainless, idiotic, perpetual manchild underwear blossoms that moan and kvetch because somebody happens to have an actual opinion that doesn’t 100% fall into line with theirs, to the point of threatening to stop using their services? They shouldn’t be in charge of your accounts. If you want to succeed in this harsh economy, you’re going to have to put that “I’m taking my toys and heading home” attitude into the memory box with your slap wraps and your friendship bracelets and man up.

And finally, fuck you, Peter Shankman, for posting this as some kind of lesson to the others. “EVERYONE, BE AFRAID. LIVE IN FEAR THAT ONE DAY YOUR TRUE FEELINGS WILL BE EXPOSED TO EVERYONE.” If we’re going to move forward as a people, we can’t afford to have bleating crybabies like you calling themselves “adventurists”.

One thought on “OK, it’s 2009, everybody.

  1. Seriously. There’s “being careful,” and then there are the people who will Google your name and use any excuse to try to twist anything you’ve ever said, no matter how offhand the remark or what the context (does anyone really take Twitter comments seriously?). Besides, who gives a fuck if some guy in some company somewhere hates Atlanta? Maybe Atlanta should get it together so that people stop hating on it. Or maybe Atlanta should deal with the fact that it sucks. Frankly, I have no opinion on Atlanta, having never seen anything that would influence me in the direction of visiting, but if it’s got these types of people defending its honour, I think that says it all.

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