The Incredible Hulk

There has been a spate of gushing praise for Ang Lee’s fucking horrible Incredible Hulk movie recently, and I’m not so sure I get it. Are you just trying to indicate that people are stupid and the universally panned film was somehow brilliant? I’m here to straighten some of these delusions out.

No, he didn’t capture the tone of the original comics. No, he didn’t follow the source material more closely than this new movie. No, he didn’t generate a brilliant tension. No, he wasn’t being daring. He ignored every fucking iota of the canon storyline, even the brilliant bits, for a slow moving slog through shit. The effects meandered the full spectrum from sub-par to laughable. The entire thing smacked of someone trying to piece together a Hulk storyline from a prepared portfolio of clippings and bullet points, it had no soul, and the character moments were as real and vivid as the intro to low-budget porn. And that’s why it failed miserably in the box office, in the rentals, and moved from big screen to small screen to tiny plastic box to footnote in fucking history as quick as a wink.

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