Novacaine

Continued from Nebulizer:

I made the bus with time to spare, not bad for a chubby little thing like me. The driver gives me a smile and I decide to sit up front so we can gossip a little. There’s almost nobody on the bus in the afternoons and I know she gets lonely.

Maybe I could ask her for help.

We chat a little about the weather, the traffic, the smelly bum who gets on at fourth and rides until his transfer is up. She looks over and asks me if I’m working out. I tell her just in the kitchen, and we laugh about it a little.

She has that look in her eye that fucking look don’t just fucking look sad help me HELP ME

I give her a little hug when it’s time to head into Albertsons, and head in to get some dinner and take care of some girl stuff at the pharmacy.

Cunt pharmacy bitch slut just fucking admit it’s wrong

The meat all looks a little old, and it makes me a little sick to smell. I think we’ll have breakfast for dinner! Some bacon and some eggs, a potato to make hash browns. A twelve pack of Icehouse, some sandwich fixings for lunch tomorrow.

Finally it’s time to head for the Pharmacy bitch to see about another just one more please a real one this time. She sees me coming and she dials something on the phone. I walk up and try to just keep calm, no problems here. Nothing big. Just need another test, the last one was tampered with. We can’t go off half cocked here, can we? We have to have accurate data.

dickheadmanagercomeswalkinguplikei’mgoingtomakeascenefuckingsmallpeckershithead

No, there’s no problem here at all, you just need to give me a new test, because this one was wrong, it was bad, it wasn’t real it was tampered with. He’s giving me some ma’am-don’t-make-a-scene line like I’m at fault here! Don’t tell me who needs to go see a doctor, you’re just a cashier who puts pills in a bottle, you silly little thing. No I wasn’t threatening, no, I’m calm, everything is fine, nothing is the matter. It’s fine, I don’t even need a refund, I’ll pay for the new one it won’t be a problem. I just need a new one and no I just want to explain it to her closer, just between us girls and no don’t pull me out of the window we’re just going to get to talk between the two of us. Let go of my bag, I will call the police if you don’t let me go I have something I need to do and I don’t care how many I’ve bought over the past week because who fucking cares you fucking WHORE WHORE WHORE WHORE WHORE YOU FUCKING WHORE I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU JUST SAY IT’S NOT FUCKING POSITIVE. IT’S MY MONEY AND I KNOW MY RIGHTS YOU FUCKING WHORE I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU KILL YOU

Please kill me

And for a while, it all goes black.

Maybe I should just have gotten the pork roast

When I come back around, here we sit, with the manager and the security guard on my arms, watching the eggs drip out of the cart and onto the floor, and nobody listens when I say they should mop it up. I don’t want to just wait for the police to get here, there’s no sense in it. There could be salmonella out there! A kid could get sick! a baby a baby And the silly thing is the mop is just right there, if they’d just let me go I could go grab it and maybe they could get some Pinesol and it’d all be fine.

And then the crew cut policeman walks in and smiles at everybody and asks what the problem is. Everybody is mad, but he’s just so smooth and seems so bright and happy that it makes me laugh. I feel them loosen the grips on my arms and everything is gonna be just fine.

As long as they get the eggs mopped up

5 thoughts on “Novacaine

  1. I think the pharmacy scene would be more powerful and clear if you have Jessie refer to the cashier and manager by name in her speech to them:
    -When her anger flips back and forth between the two I got a little confused who was who with just the pronouns and expletives switching gender.
    -It’s very common for people in Jessie’s position to call someone by name if they are angry and annoyed with them, especially if they need something from the person. It’s a way of unconsciously trying to be both condescending and persuasive at the same time. (I have a theory this is why a lot of people don’t like their names and want to change them.)
    -It would be easier to picture the characters if they are named. You might want to bring them back into the story later. Maybe they have to testify in court.. haha maybe I watch too much law and order svu.

    I really love the picture you create with the broken eggs dripping out of the cart. It adds a feeling of depth and sincerity. Like the eggs subconsciously remind us of fertility. And Jessie wanting to having them cleaned up like she wishes she could clean up the mess she got herself into with the pregnancy. That part is classic.

    Jessie is such a hard character, almost pummeling the reader, but that’s ok I think. She’s so desperate and yet it’s so hard to feel sorry for her because she’s so masochistic and passive aggressive. I’m ready to get back to being followed guy. What is his name anyway?
    : )

  2. I like the idea of her reading the name badges and using the names. How do you like this?

    No, Gold-Badge Assistant Manager Bert, there’s no problem here at all, Eileen, you just need to give me a new test, because this one was wrong, it was bad, Eileen, it wasn’t real it was tampered with. Assistant Manager Bert’s giving me some ma’am-don’t-make-a-scene line like I’m at fault here! Don’t tell me who needs to go see a doctor, Eileen, you’re just a cashier who puts pills in a bottle, you silly little thing. No I wasn’t threatening anyone, littlepecker Bert. No, I’m calm, everything is fine, nothing is the matter. It’s fine, I don’t even need a refund, I’ll pay for the new one it won’t be a problem. I just need a new one and no I just want to explain it to her closer, just between us girls and no don’t pull me out of the window, Assistant Manager Bert, we’re just going to get to talk between the two of us. Let go of my bag, Bert, or I will call the police if you don’t let me go I have something I need to do and I don’t care how many I’ve bought over the past week because who fucking cares you are a fucking WHORE, Eileen – WHORE WHORE WHORE WHORE YOU FUCKING WHORE I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU JUST SAY IT’S NOT FUCKING POSITIVE. IT’S MY MONEY AND I KNOW MY RIGHTS YOU FUCKING WHORE I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU KILL YOU

    I think it’s important, since she’s such so self-absorbed (I kind of think of her as a psychotic narcissist), that the names only really work as labels for her, I’m not sure that the bus driver will have a name, and obviously Ben, there, he’s got a name. It’s tough writing her though because she’s crazy and the sane part of her brain is like a passenger in this insane body (totally ripping off the Hulk here). I certainly think I’m going to expand this bit out later, to drain some of the bunched-up feeling in the timeline. This technically lasts from when Ben and Willy (still not stuck on that name, but I kind of like it) are drinking in the park until just after Willy heads home. I think I’ll leave it here and have the next part of Jessie’s story trail Willy, instead of moving forward with her (which was my original plan). She’s like writing a migraine.

  3. Also need to tighten up the verb tenses and voice in this one, I think it’s a little ugly right now, and part of the confusion comes from the switches from first person to third person. I’ll play with it some more when I get time(!)

  4. Yes, I like it better with Eileen and Bert and the image of the gold badge. Not sure what I think about the name Willy. It’s ok, I’ll let you know if I think of a different name I like better.

    If you are going to expand out the time more, I’d like to see the bus scene lengthened. A lot of riders are annoyed by crazy/psychotic people on the bus. I think it would be funny and ironic if she is acting all annoyed by the normal people on the bus.

    I can see how writing in her voice would be really difficult. Maybe you should take a break and come back to it later.

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